Second Ultrasound at 8 weeks 5 days

My second and last US with my RE at 8.5 weeks was Monday.  A heartbeat of 165 bpm was heard and a fetus was actually visualised that looked somewhat like a baby!  I got to see the flickering heart, spine, legs, arms, umbilical cord and even fingers!

I have flipped the US picture upside so you can see the baby right side up.  At top is the head and bottom are the legs, an arm is to the left and the umbilical cord is going off to the right towards the yolk sac.

Here is a video of the heartbeat!  My RE said that there is now less than a 3% chance of SAB/miscarriage after hearing the heartbeat for a second time.  Yay!

Honestly, I am still in shock.  Overjoyed and excited, but still in a bit of disbelief.  I just cannot believe it worked on the first round.  I really thought we were going to be like many couples who have to go through heaps of rounds before we met with success.  What faith, hey?  My RE was thrilled though for us, and I am happy for them as well as my data will help their success rate go up in the women over 35 category.

Sadly, I am graduating from my RE office.  I am 9 weeks today and will stop daily progesterone at 10 weeks.  I will then see my midwife (also my preceptor) on 4 January for a new OB appointment where I will be scheduling first trimester screenings at that point due to my age.

I am excited about going forward and am trying to have loads of faith that all will work out fine.  I am thankful for all my friends' and family's support and prayers.  It really means the world to me (and us!).

Support During Infertility

Just a quick post to give a shout out to my wonderful infertility support group!

I never knew there was a support group in my area until a friend in NYC sent me a link to Resolve: http://www.resolve.org/.  Here you can search for a support group in your local area, and lo' and behold I found one just down the street!

Since my husband has been deployed throughout this entire process, these ladies have been such a wonderful system of support and laughs.  I have many friends who are supportive, but they will never fully understand what it is like to go through IVF.  These women know exactly what is involved and each share encouraging stories from their trials and tribulations of infertility.  The leader of our group even checks on me weekly to see how I am doing.  It has been a lifesaver, literally.

So if you are in need of human, in-the-flesh support, please find a local group in your area via the link above.  If there is no local group in your area, start one!  I am sure there are many others that are in need of an active support group in your city.  

We Have a Heartbeat!

I am still a bit shocked, to say the least.  I was well prepared to hear the news that there had been an early loss.  I have seen 4 patients in the last 2 weeks with SABs (spontaneous abortions) at the 6 week mark.  I did not even look at the monitor initially and was hoping I would not cry.

Then... there was a heartbeat!

Loud and clear at 135 bpm.  I then looked at the monitor in shock and disbelief!  I still cannot believe that I am actually carrying a baby.  That I am really, truly pregnant.  That our IVF worked on the very first round!  I really thought we would be going through round after round before success would find us.  It is still all very surreal, but I am excited, overwhelmed and elated.  I know there is still a chance for a SAB, but I am holding out hope that each week goes by successfully and healthfully.

I have another 9 week appointment on 26 December.  It will be my last appointment with my RE if all is well.  I will then follow up with a midwifery new OB appointment on 4 January.  I want to do 1st trimester screening as close to 10 weeks as possible as there is a decreased likelihood of false positives at this point.  My biggest fear right now is Down's Syndrome or a fetal anomaly.  I am praying daily for a healthy baby that makes it to term with no complications!

Currently, I am looking into hiring a doula.  They book up fast around here, so I am hoping I can find a good fit and one that is free for my EDD.  My due date is 1 August 2012!

Finally, I will leave you with a picture of our little bean.  Hard to see a fetus here, but the yolk sac is to the left and the fetus is to the right.  This is a great website that shows week to week how a fetus grows as seen via US:  http://www.baby2see.com/development/ultrasound_sonogram/first_trimester_scans.html#week6.

As you can see by the website above, our little bean is right on track for turning into an adorable little baby. 

Financial Costs of Infertility Treatment

Outlined below are our costs that we have paid so far for infertility treatment.

• 3 rounds of IUI at $500/ea = $1500
• Infectious disease testing $75 per person = $150
• IVF via the Attain Program (4 rounds - 2 fresh/2 frozen) = $16,500
• IVF sperm workup = $300
• Cryopreservation of sperm (done prior to my husband deploying) = $100
• Daily injectables for 1st round = $3500
• Anesthesia for egg retrieval = $500

Grand total for thus far: $22,550, and for 1st round of IVF:  $21,050.

NB:  Our insurance, Tricare, did not pay for any of the treatment.  The only meds they paid for were Clomid, Lupron and progesterone - all the inexpensive ones.  So much for supporting the troops, especially since it is male infertility factor for us!

We drained our savings of all we had - $9,000 - and the other $7,500 came from a Springstone Fertility Loan.  We had no idea the injectables would be $3500 and so when we received that call from the pharmacy, I almost fainted.  We had to take out another loan for the $3500 as it had to be paid immediately to start the round.  So in total, we took out $11,000 in loans.  The rest of the charges we paid in cash.  In cash total, it was $9,000 from savings and $2550 over time from our checking for a total of $11,550.  It looks like it works out to 1/2 in cash and 1/2 in loans.

I wish we did not have to take out any loans, but I also wish we did not have to drain our savings.  This kind of expense puts a lot of pressure on the process of having a baby.  No longer is a just a nice dinner and a bottle of wine.  Now, it is tens of thousands of dollars.  

Needless to say, even though my RE has said it is fine to go back to regular daily activities, I am still taking it easy.  I have not returned to my daily exercise régime or Ashtanga yoga practise.  I do still walk my dogs daily and go to work, but I am still careful in both of those.  I am holding out for the 6.5 week US on 12 December to see a heartbeat, so I can know for sure I am actually pregnant.  I know many people do many things during the first four weeks, including jumping on trampolines, and still remain pregnant, but with this much money at stake, I'm playing it safe and hoping not to be sorry.

Beta Site

A great site that collects Beta results - now from over 61,000 women - and shows median levels for singleton and multiple pregnancies.

http://betabase.info/index.php

BFP!!!

For those not in the fertility acronym know, BFP = Big Fat Positive!

Monday morning before work I decided to do an early home pregnancy test (HPT) since I had 2 sticks.  I figured I would test Monday and Tuesday and then have my blood drawn on Wednesday.  I had no expectation of being positive at this point.  I had already had so many negative HPTs, that I did not hold much hope for a positive one.  I urinated on the stick (First Response) and then hopped in the shower.  As I was showering I even told myself, "Don't be disappointed when it is negative.  It is still very early."  After my shower, I decided to have a quick peek.  And then a double look.  Then a close up squinty inspection.  I could not believe it.  There were actually 2 lines - one dark, one light.  How could that possibly be???

I quickly readied for the day, and then called my RE office.  I really thought they would tell me to still keep my Wednesday appointment, but instead they squealed with glee and told me to come in right away.  On my way to work I swung by and had my blood drawn for my quantitative B-hCG and progesterone levels.  As I was coming out of the room after blood draw, all the nurses were lined up to say congratulations and give me big hugs.  It was so incredibly sweet!

I received a call from one of the RNs later that day saying my quant level was at 165 and my progesterone was good at over 40.  

At this point, I was still trying to fetter my joy.  I was extremely happy, but I still knew that my quant could go down, I could have a spontaneous abortion (SAB),  and any number of things could go wrong.  I have seen 2 patients in the last week who had a loss between 4-6 weeks, and so I did not want to let myself become too excited or committed to thinking I was indeed pregnant.

It is hard for my husband and I to talk since he is 9.5 hours ahead of me and working a variety of shifts, but I shared the news with my husband in Afghanistan that night via Skype.  I just held up the HPT stick to the camera.  He was shocked and happy and then a bit sad that he was missing it all thousands of miles away.

This was 10 dpt (days post-transfer).  

Now today, on 12 dpt, my quant is 362 (more than doubled!) and my progesterone is still really good (thanks to all those self-inflicted IM injections!).  

Next up is an ultrasound at 6 weeks and 5 days on 12 December.  I am hoping for twins (although my husband is definitely not!), but I will be happy for a singleton.  I just want a very healthy, happy baby that makes it to term.  That is all that really matters.

ET

No, not extraterrestrial (although it all feels very sci-fi), but rather embryo transfer.

I had my only 2 embryos (1-8 cell B with clean margins and 1-4 cell B with fragmented edges) transferred on Friday - day 2 and a very auspicious day - 11/11/11.

Here are my little embies on day 2 - I call them Violet & Poppy.  I am hoping with all hope that at least one of them (although I would love to have twins!) stick and stay, and develop into a lovely little baby.

The embryos are too small to see with the naked eye, but in this short clip of my ET, you can see little white dots (air bubbles and fluid surrounding the embyros) on US.

I am feeling a bit crampy (hoping that is implantation!) but overall doing well.  Still a tiny sore from my egg retrieval (where my RE punctured the vaginal wall bilatterally in order to retrieve eggs from both ovaries), but I am feeling better each day.  I have Friday-Monday off, so that has been a blessing.  I have been doing lots of lounging, resting and relaxing along with trying to work out my landmarks for the IM (intramuscular) self-injection of 1 mL of progesterone in oil (PIO) every night.  This sounds easier than it is.  I am still trying to master it!  So easy to do on another person, a painful quagmire to do on myself.

Ay!  Now, there is nothing to do but wait.  The dreaded 2 week wait (2ww).  I am hoping this 2ww goes by quickly and yields a positive hCG.  My beta hCG will be on the 23rd of November (the day before Thanksgiving, how apropos!), and I can do a home test 1-2 days before although it can give a false-negative.  Not sure yet what I will do.  I do not want to get disappointed early, but I also want to know as soon as possible.  Hoping I can stay sane and positive throughout the duration of this 2ww!